Friday, September 28, 2012
A Shot in the Arm
We (I use the word "we" loosely) give Amélie an allergy shot twice a week. She hates them. I hate it that she has to endure them, but her allergies are wretched, and I know how wretched they are because I watch her in her absolutely misery and empathize on a level that I wish I didn't know. I endured allergy shots for 10 years. Ten years. I honestly don't think my allergies ever got any better, but apparently, in the past few years, allergy shots have come a long, long way. Apparently, allergy shots now have a 95% success rate.
(I know some of you out there are wanting to hand poor Amélie a glass of elderberry juice and tablespoonfuls of raw, local honey rather than these poisonous shots. I know. I know. I know. I tried that.)
There is always a significant amount of serum left when it is time to move on to the next vial. Matt had this brilliant idea that he should give me shots of Amélie's leftovers. I thought that was a good idea, too.*
Until tonight, our first experiment with Amélie's allergic leftovers.
I was actually taking a bath in Jack's bath water (Yes, I did this. I just added another 6 inches of really hot water to kill any little boy germs.). Matt walked in the bathroom with a drink in one hand and a syringe in the other.** He shot me in the arm, it didn't hurt a bit, and then I sipped my drink, read my book, finished up my bath and headed up to bed.
When I had allergy shots from 3rd grade until the end of my first year of college, I always had to stay for 20 minutes in the doctor's office and make sure that I didn't have a reaction. I never did. Until tonight.
My arm isn't sore. I don't think it is even red.*** But I am an absolute wreck.
My nose is running. Tiny needles feel like they are pricking my throat. I am wheezing. My eyes are itchy. My ears itch. My gums feel incredibly sensitive, and the only thing that brings them relief is if I actually jab my fingernails into the tissue between my gums and teeth. ???!!! My palms itch. My palms itch!?!? I was miserably sitting in bed a little bit ago assessing my situation. I sat plopped upon my mattress with disheveled hair and dirty tissues surrounding me. My sheets were sneezed upon. My breathing was labored. I alternated between pressing my fingernails into my gums and itching my palms with my teeth. My teeth!?!?
And I had an epiphany.
Crazy people aren't really crazy.
They just have allergies.
*Matt actually asked the nurse if we could do this. She said yes.
**I realized this morning that Matt gave me a shot from the vial of the SECOND round of shots. Good thing I'm still alive.
***Oh, what a night will do! This morning I have a 4" red, hot, hard welt on my arm. Lovely!!!